Inspection Results

It's always interesting when someone evaluates your home.  We've been living in it for 6 years and never had a problem.  The house is only 6yrs old so what could possibly be wrong??  They came up with 7 things.

1)  Radon.  I expected that there would be radon b/c all the neighbors had it.  We've never had it tested b/c we never go in our basement.  Apparently on a Radon test 0-4 is "safe".  Our score was.... drum roll please.... 14.  The opposite of safe.

2) Sump Pump.  One of the disadvantages of our current back yard is that it is completely sloped which means you can't put a big patio or a swing set.  At the bottom corner of our yard is a drain (think grate where you don't want to know what weirdo things are dwelling down there).  Because of our elevation and the grate, we would never get water in our basement.  Most of our basement is probably above the grate.  As such, in 6 yrs I have NEVER heard the sump pump go on.  According the the inspector that is because the sump pump doesn't work.  Huh.  I guess you have to periodically put water in the hole in the ground. 

3)  Squishy wood.  The wood trim around the window in the front of the house was squishy in one spot.  They asked us to caulk around the window.  I went out there to inspect the squishyness and when I pressed on it the thing practically caved in.  So now it looks worse than when it was inspected. Awesome.

4)  Pipe caps.  On the roof of your house there are pipes that let the sewage smells escape your house.  Ours still had the caps on them as if they had just come out of the factory (6 yrs ago).  For 6 yrs we have been trying to find out why the jacuzzi tub smells like sewer after you take a shower.  Now we know.  Thanks MI Homes... you are going to get your asses out here and fix that.

Those 4 are the ones we agreed to.  4 out of the 7.  The next three were ridiculous and we said no way Jose.  As a testament to how stupid these requests were, when we responded with "no way Jose" the buyers just signed it.  No ifs ands or buts.

5)  Slanty AC.  The air conditioner is not level and that MAY decrease the life of the a/c.  You should have someone come out and inspect it and make it level and possibly replace it.  Um, no.  It works fine. If you want it level, stick a brick under it when you move in. 

6)  Heater.  The heater "turns off before it reaches the correct heat."  What?  Um, no.  It works fine.  Plus we had it inspected in October - here's the invoice suckers! - and we already bought you a 1yr warranty on all appliances.  

7)  Lightening.  If your house got struck by lightening, it would probably catch fire because of "blah blah blah".  No shit Sherlock.  If the house got struck by lightening that would not be cool.  However, all those "blah blah blah"s you speak of were built like that 6 yrs ago and are up to code.  If you are worried about lightening striking then YOU can pay to get it inspected.

I'm glad the inspection stuff is over.  Now on to the appraisal.